If you want it, you got it, all you got to do is believe...

Why females should avoid a girl's night after they are married:
  The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls." I
told my  husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!"
 
 Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.
Around 3  a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the
 cuckoo  clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.  Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9  times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a
quick-witted solution (even when totally smashed), in order to escape a possible
  conflict  with him.  The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told
him  "Midnight". He didn't seem pissed off at all.  Whew! Got away with that one!
 
  Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."  When I asked him why, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three  times, then said, "Oh shit!", cuckooed 4 more times, cleared it's throat,
  cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped  over the coffee table and farted."
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